Freudenfreude
the opposite of schadenfreude
You probably have heard of schadenfreude, taking pleasure in other people’s misfortunes. Freudenfreude is the opposite, it’s being happy in other people’s successes, joys, and fortunes.1
The Olympics is a great time to practice some freudenfreude. Because freudenfreude is vicarious joy, right? I have watched an unruly amount of Olympics the last two weeks. Especially given that it’s not in my timezone. But I’ve watched skateboarding, bmx, climbing, a lot of gymnastics, a smattering of swimming, and virtually all the weightlifting.
This is probably the first time I’ve ever watched the weightlifting knowing the lifters, at least in a para-social sense. That is, I’ve been following weightlifting as a sport for a couple of years now, and have watched several major competitions (World Championships, etc.), and read and consume weightlifting media, and so I would happily tell you that I’m a fan of the sport (as well as an amateur practitioner). And this changed how I watch it. Now I know who each (most) competitor is, and how they’ve gone in past competitions, and their chances of winning, and their rivalries, and so on and so forth.
All of which makes you more invested in the sport. You cheer people on because you want them, and them specifically, to win. I’m not cheering for nations, I’m cheering individual persons because I want to see them succeed. And the joy I feel when they do is precisely freudenfreude.
But freudenfreude goes beyond sport, it’s a virtue we should cultivate in all of life. It’s something I’ve been working on. I think it’s harder when it’s in your own field. When acquaintances and friends succeed in the very areas where I am, or have been; when people get academic jobs, or other similar successes, it’s much harder to have freudenfreude and much easier to indulge in envy or bitterness. Freudenfreude is perhaps hardest to practice when it’s others succeeding/winning/enjoying/getting the very things that you want and you don’t get. That’s when the pain is greatest for us.
Which is one reason to cultivate freudenfreude all the more when it’s not about those things. My working hypothesis here is that practising freudenfreude when it’s easier, makes it easy when it’s harder. So, learning to rejoice in your friends’ triumphs is relatively easy when they’re nothing to do with your desires and longings. And it’s also easier to rejoice with friends than with less close people. There’s more genuine joy in my life these days from friends doing well. It’s the “rejoicing with those who rejoice” side of empathy.
The more we do this, the more we enter into both the joys and sorrows of others. Which is a step closer to the life in communion and community we are made for.
Technically this word was made up by social scientists.